"One is Almost Tempted to Say [ She ] Looks Stranger As a Woman Than She Does as a Man."

This reader’s favorite blogging belle lettriste speaks!

As usual, she rails against thuggish, bovver-booted, queer theory and babbles on about her personal problems, though no mention of that doll, Blakey. (Someone is being frozen out of the LRB.) Today what ails is a xenophobic frustration with dipthongs.

In my own case – it’s true – certain vile French diphthongs may be part of the problem: the phonetic distinctions between Cahun, Caen, Caïn, Cannes, Cohn, canne, cane, cagne, camp, cône and con remain, sadly, a perpetual trial.

This reader was riveted. Is it OK for her to end on con?

There is also an extended digression about Stein and Toklas, as the stodgy heterosexual subscribers to the London Review of Books are titillated with more lesbian gossip from eighty years ago. It turns out that Toklas was butcher than her husband. Interesting… or is it, really? Akin to Poe’s “teeth,” the word “butch” is repeated four or five times in this article. She admits to this parenthetically: “The hoary old butch-femme distinction is one I’ve had a hard time avoiding in this piece.” That’s probably because Ms. Castle wishes to be a butch but doesn’t know where to put her arms. Sing along, now. C’mon! You know the words. We’ve all heard her familiar refrain of “Damn, I Wish I Were Mary Cheney’s Lover.” Also lots of stuff on the kind of imagery she finds wrenching (hint: if you want to impress her, photoshop her face pic into blackface).

All in all, more dithering and less entertainingly Alzheimery than usual. In general, it is more amusing to read Castle as she mixes literary observations in with anecdotes about her “Autistic Trip” to New Mexico with her elderly mother (whom TC openly mocks before dumping her by a tree for a couple of hours while she gets her drink on). Nevertheless, Dreamboat TC is still my most cherished attention whore… even if she didn’t get uninvited from any funerals this month.

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10 Responses to “"One is Almost Tempted to Say [ She ] Looks Stranger As a Woman Than She Does as a Man."”

  1. Victoria J. van Dijk Says:

    Ms. Castle wishes to be a butch but doesn’t know where to put her arms.I’m howling with laughter over this! Best description ever of failed butchdom.Have no doubt that I know where to put mine!

  2. Victoria J. van Dijk Says:

    You know, you’re actually inviting her to come take a look at your blog. I understand she likes to google her name to relish her own fame–or should I say notoriety?

  3. darknessatnoon Says:

    I welcome Dreamboat TC to ego-surf her way to my humble abode.

  4. Victoria J. van Dijk Says:

    In other words, Who’s Afraid of Terry Castle?

  5. darknessatnoon Says:

    Anyone sitting in the first row.

  6. Skyresh Bolgolam Says:

    Dear Darkness,Someone sent me this link–diss-ego surfing? That doll is of course a relative term. But Terrence, my beloved, is really very sweet–the persona is fierce, but the heart beneath is pure gold.–B.

  7. Victoria J. van Dijk Says:

    Did someone have a sex-change operation?No surgery will make you butch.

  8. Victoria J. van Dijk Says:

    Well you should see Polythene Pam She’s so good looking But she looks like a man Well, you should see her in drag dressed in a polythene bag Yes you should see Polythene Pam Yeh, yeh, yeh Get a dose of her in jackboot and kilt She’s killer diller when she’s dressed to the hilt She’s the kind of a girl that makes the news of the world Yes you could say she was attractively built Yeh, yeh, yeh

  9. darknessatnoon Says:

    Dear B,Thanks for spraying on my territory.What is it about these “sweet” hearts that leads them to lash out so viciously at others in print, I wonder? In my mind of minds, I’m a curmudgeon myself and have a lot of admiration for the kind of mumble-grumble criticism the Dreamboat specializes in. If not admiration, I at least have a visceral reaction to it!I’m glad a scholar of satire, however, doesn’t take issue with ad hominem attack. There’s admirable consistency in that.Given the sheer number of queeny blogs that seem to revere Dreamboat TC, I’m sure ego-surfing is typically a delicate pleasure for your Terrence.Why doll? The Killing of Sister George must have imprinted too strongly on me. I imagine your relationship to be something like that between Beryl Reid and Susannah York. ‘Childi’ wore some fabulous doll dresses.

  10. Victoria J. van Dijk Says:

    Now what kind of butch sends her girlfriend to beat people up on her behalf?

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